11 Black Women + Femmes Shaping the Grief Space: Therapists, Coaches, & Authors to Follow on Instagram

Death Doula Alua Arthur | Image copyright: TED Talks, 2023

Grief is universal—but the way we talk about it, support each other through it, and make space for it in our lives is deeply shaped by culture, identity, and lived experience. And yet, the most widely known grief books, therapists, and social media accounts share a predominantly white perspective.

Black women and femmes have long been at the forefront of grief work, not only as therapists and authors but as activists, artists, and educators—shaping the grief space in ways that acknowledge the intersections of race, privilege, and systemic loss. Their work invites us to see grief through a more expansive lens: one that holds space for both personal and collective grief, for both healing and resistance, for both deep sorrow and radical joy.

As we close out Black History Month and move into Women’s History Month, it’s the perfect time to honor the Black women and femmes who are shaping the way the world understands grief, healing, and what it means to be alive right now.

These 11 thought leaders are shifting conversations around loss and helping us process it in ways that feel honest, whole, and culturally informed. I hope you’ll join me in following them on Instagram, buying their books, courses, and products, and committing to learning from their wisdom.

Therapist and author Nedra Glover Tawwab | Image copyright: Ariel Perry

Black Therapists

Nedra Glover Tawwab (@nedratawwab)

One thing NOBODY told me after my mom died was that boundaries are a huge part of grieving—setting boundaries, adjusting boundaries, and getting rid of boundaries that no longer served me. Grief changes our “terms of engagement” and there is no other expert alive today that I trust with conversations about boundaries than Nedra Glover Tawwab. Her book, Set Boundaries, Find Peace is one I recommend regularly to my grieving clients and students, and her posts about setting boundaries during seasons of heavy grief are mega-helpful.

Nedra’s website: https://www.nedratawwab.com/

Dr. Mekel Harris (@drmekel)

Grief is multi-faceted and figuring out how to balance it all can feel overwhelming. Dr. Mekel is a kind, grounded voice offering practical tips and tools for navigating life after loss as well as more faith-based guidance if your relationship with God is a significant part of your grief. As somebody whose faith crumbled in the wake of my mom’s death, her insights on spirituality heal something in me. If you’d like to see Dr. Mekel and me in conversation, check out this replay of an Instagram Live we did in 2024!

Dr. Mekel’s website: https://mekelharrisphd.com/

Certified grief coach and educator Dr. Julie Shaw | Image copyright: Dr. Julie Shaw

Black Death Doulas, Grief Coaches, and End-of-Life Educators

Alua Arthur (@going_with_grace)

There is literally no one like else like Alua Arthur, often recognized as “America’s leading death doula.” Her thoughtful, colorful, and often funny posts encourage you to live fully so that you can die well and at peace. To date, she’s certified hundreds of death doulas around the world, and I recommend her online courses on pondering mortality to anyone looking to get a little more comfortable with the idea of their eventual death. Alua was a guest on my podcast Coming Back in 2019.

Alua’s website: https://goingwithgrace.com/

Joél Simone Maldonado aka “The Grave Woman” (@thegravewoman)

As the founder of The Multicultural Death & Grief Care Academy, Joél helps funeral homes, death doulas, and grief and health care practitioners provide dignified end-of-life care for communities of color, including education on styling Black hair for funeral services and insight on funeral rituals such as the tradition of African and African diasporic Homegoings. In the U.S., where some of the biggest, oldest end-of-life care organizations are led by white folks, her work is crucial in helping people of color feel seen and heard—even and especially in death.

Joél’s website: https://thegravewoman.com/

Dr. Julie Shaw (@helloimgrieving)

Many people think of grief as an invader, a strange presence that’s forced its way into their lives, making them miserable, exhausted, and much, much different than they were before loss. Dr. Julie Shaw of Hello, I’m Grieving is working to reframe grief, not as a threatening intruder, but as a presence worth having a conversation with. Through her podcast and grief merch, she invites you to “Say hello to grief!” Her insights on infertility, queerness, grief in sports, and grief in the workplace are just some of the top topics I follow her for.

Dr. Julie’s website: https://www.helloimgrieving.com/

Naila Francis (@thishallowedwilderness)

If you’re looking for a gentle guide in grief, look no further than Naila Francis. From Instagram poetry readings to in-person gatherings in Philadelphia through her organization, Salt Trails Collective, Naila holds hurting hearts with the lightest, most compassionate touch. Her work will encourage you to take a moment for mindfulness, honor all of the emotions that come along with grief, and find profound comfort in the words of others.

Naila’s website: https://www.thishallowedwilderness.com/

Author and activist Sonya Renee Taylor | Image copyright: Saddi Khali, Andi Crown, Wear Your Voice, John Milus

Black Authors

Sonya Renee Taylor (@sonyareneetaylor)

Grief is more than emotional; it’s physical. And one of my favorite books on figuring out how to accept and love the ways grief altered my body is The Body Is Not an Apology. Sonya Renee Taylor’s thoughts on radical self-love show you how to break free from what society says your body “should” be and embrace it as it is. Her unique way of weaving in justice work, activism, empathy, and love for ourselves and others show up in all of her posts and offerings. I always leave her virtual presence feeling grounded, inspired, and empowered to take action.

Sonya’s website: https://www.sonyareneetaylor.com/

Rachel Ricketts (@iamrachelricketts)

If you’re a white person who wants to get better at racial justice work, Rachel Rickett’s book Do Better is for you. Part mother-loss memoir, part action guide, it’s a step-by-step manual for unlearning the ways in which society teaches us to defer to and uphold white supremacy and notice all the ways we can dismantle it—both in our personal and public lives. Rachel’s words are not always comfortable to read, but they are important. Her Instagram is also a place to find affirmations on healing, grounding exercises, wisdom on current grief-related events, and thoughts on grief being a tool for taking generative action.

Rachel’s website: https://www.rachelricketts.com/

Marisa Renee Lee (@marisareneelee)

Based on her lived experience losing her mom, a pregnancy, and a cousin, Marisa Renee Lee’s book Grief Is Love explores what it looks like to life a beautiful life after devastating loss. She knows from experience that moving forward does not mean letting go and dives deep into how you can give yourself permission and space to grieve while also remembering the people you’ve lost with love.

Marisa’s website: https://www.marisareneelee.com/

Rachel Cargle (@rachel.cargle)

I’ve been following Rachel Cargle for years and adore her regular Instagram posts about grieving and remembering her mom and returning to life after life’s hardest breaking points. Her latest book, A Renaissance of Our Own is a memoir about her personal transformation from a small-town Christian wife to an incisive queer feminist voice of a generation. In addition, Rachel is a HUGE book lover and her bookshop Elizabeth’s Bookshop and Writing Centre in Akron, Ohio is a beacon for marginalized writers whose work isn’t usually picked up by mainstream publishers.

Rachel’s website: https://rachelcargle.com/

Artist and author Morgan Harper Nichols | Image copyright: Morgan Harper Nichols

Black Artists

Morgan Harper Nichols (@morganharpernichols)

Soothing, encouraging words and beautiful watercolor-like art come together across Morgan Harper Nichols’ work. Gentle sentiments like “Let this day be what it needs to be,” and “For all that I am saying ‘goodbye’ to, I am making room to grow and thrive in new ways too,” are just two examples of the kind of posts you can find on her page. When reading a book is too hard, seeing a small, beautiful sentence from her feels like a blessing in the darkness of grief.

Morgan’s website: https://morganharpernichols.com/

Your Next Steps: Follow, Learn, and Engage with Black Women and Femme Grief Educators—on Instagram and Beyond!

The way we experience loss is shaped by our histories, identities, and the communities we come from. The women and femmes on this list are doing the vital work of making society’s portrait of grief more inclusive, more nuanced, and more human. And they’re offering this emotional, educational work for free on social media each and every week!

Amid the devastating rollback of DEI programming in the U.S. and the continued oppression of Black people and women worldwide, it’s more important than ever to support and uplift the work of Black women and femmes who are doing the labor of expanding our understanding of grief.

If their words resonate with you, follow them, engage with their work, and share their wisdom with your community.

And if you have the financial means to do so, please pay to gain even more of their wisdom—whether you buy a book, take a course, buy a product, or join a community.

When we widen the lens on grief, we make more room for healing—not just for ourselves, but for everyone.